by aspen&pine

reflections on faith and trust

We have been traveling this past month, on an impromptu trip. This is how it happened: a friend of Jordan’s had an extra ticket to WPPI, a photography conference in Las Vegas. The decision was made a week before and off we went, and kept going all the way to the California coast for what ended up being almost a month. We’ve had a lot of fun adventuring, and now are winding down back on the east coast at Jordan’s grandparent’s condo in Cherry Grove, SC. We’ll be going home to Virginia tomorrow, so we are enjoying our last day here with walks on the beach.

This morning a dense fog covered everything after a storm passed through last night. I ventured out around 10:00am and the fog was still hanging out on the beach. It was beautiful, and mysterious. Even though there were other people on the beach you felt that you were in solitude as their shadowy figures passed silently through the fog. It was a perfect time for quiet reflection.

The rhythmic sound of the waves was so peaceful and I began to think how this is exactly how trust and faith works: just like walking through fog. I could not see out into the ocean, that it actually stretched on endlessly, and got very deep. All I could see was a small shallow strip of water. Just like life. We can’t see the future, how deep it is, or the trials we’ll face. We can only have faith that God is there and that he’ll guide us through it. If I go out on my own through the fog of life, I’d end up in deep water, unable to save myself.

Trusting another person is also like walking through the fog. We trust those closest to us, but we cannot control their actions. We can’t force our spouses and families love us, change their habits or beliefs. We can only trust that they will, and this trust is a powerful thing. It opens ourselves and others up to growth. When we trust another person wholly, we make ourselves vulnerable. Vulnerable to be hurt, but also to share something amazing that will benefit both persons in the relationship. Trust in a close relationship helps us become more compassionate and giving people. It also gives others in the relationship space to grow themselves, without the stress of being judged for their actions.

Our relationships help us to identify areas we need to work on, and gives us lots of practice in fixing those areas. Since getting married on August 6th, 2011, I discovered that I was actually a selfish control freak of a person. Over time, however, I have realized how silly half the things I get upset about really are. Though I have a long way to go to be truly selfless, I know that at least I can work on it and will have opportunities to do just that every day.